6 Very Powerful Flirting and Sexual Attraction Body Language Signals

In the game of sexual attraction what you say isn't as nearly important as what your body says. In fact if you are so good at silent speech, you can say so much more with your body than words can ever do for you.

Here's how it's done.

1. Triangulating Eye Contact

First you need to draw attention to yourself. That can be achieved with fiddling with the collar, necklace or earring, or flicking dust from your sleeve or shoulder, just to name a few. After you catch his or her attention, hold his or her gaze for about 3 seconds, break eye contact downwards to take in the nose, lips and chin.

Triangulating eye-contact communicates the desire to know the other person more intimately (and I am not talking about "sex" people!). Keep in mind that while men generally do not mind prolonged eye contact with a strange woman (in fact they crave it especially if she's drop dead gorgeous), women on the other hand tend to be rather irritated by prolonged stares of unknown men (even great looking ones).

Also beware of cultural differences.

2. Eyebrow Flash

Eye contact with an eyebrow flash followed by a smile has an even more powerful effect.

Make eye contact, hold his or her gaze for about 3 seconds and break eye contact downwards (very briefly). As you look up again, take note of the chin, lips, nose and work your way up to the eyes. Add in the eyebrow flash and smile.

The message you want to send is "I was only being polite at first...but now that I've taken a good look....OH-WOW!"

Shy people can do this one so much better than the more aggressive type because subtlety and modesty comes to shy men and women naturally.

3. Eye Catching

Once you have his or her attention and conversation is flowing, use your fingers to draw attention to your eyes and to keep his or her gaze focused on you - and you alone. This is especially important when the exchange is taking place in cramped or crowded conditions.

Subtly touch your nose or gently rub your cheek making sure your index finger touches the area around the outer corner of your eye; your other fingers pointing on touching the mouth area. This says, "See, we're having a conversation here". To create maximum rapport be sure to hold eye contact when the other person is talking, then as his or her gaze begins to wander, bring it back by directing his or her eyes to your eyes and mouth area.

Another thing you can do is hold your face in both hands with the chin resting on your palms and elbows on the table. Gently stroke the area around the outer corners of both eyes with you index or middle finger; the other fingers slightly spread out in a semi-circle around your face. This gives the illusion of a whisper or secret being shared. Very intimate!

And if you wear glasses, slowly take them off, rub your eyes very briefly and put the glasses back on. But please, make sure it's not so obvious. And don't poke your eyes red because the apple of your eye has his or her attention drawn to the dude or chic the other side of the room. You have to make the conversation interesting as well, not just trying desperately to mechanically hold his or her gaze.

4. Sideways Glance

This is best achieved when walking away or when sitting with your back turned towards the person you want to be drawn towards you. Slowly look back with partially closed eyelids but drop the gaze the moment after it has been noticed. This gaze drop should be very brief. Look up triangulating your eye contact starting with the chin, lips, nose and working your way up to the eyes. Smile.

Moistening the lips at the same time you drop the gaze increases sexual tension.

For women, the sideways glance combined with a hair toss and parted lips can be very powerful. For men, this with the eyebrow flash is devastating! But you need a little bit of male-confidence not to appear creepy.

5. The Leg Cross (women only)

Entwined legs draw attention to body poise and give the impression of high muscle tone. Crossing and uncrossing legs while being watched by an interested male is a strong attraction signal, especially when you simultaneously hold eye contact, tilt your head sideways and stroke or rub a knee.

The catch here is that the type of men you are most likely to attract with this move are horny men - yeah, the hit-and-run type! So unless you really know the guy and have his stats checked out, keep both your feet on the ground - and together.

And if you're a couple or even married, these body language moves can work wonders for your sexual chemistry. And when combined with prolonged eye contact and fondling cylindrical object like the stem of a wine glass, straw, pen, pencil or cigarette... Aiyaiyaiyiayai! Houston, We Have a Problem".

6. The Cowboy Hook (men only)

This "I am all man!" dominant stance calls for extra male confidence to pull it off. Works with thumbs tucked in the belt and the other fingers resting on the sides of the thighs framing the groin area (did I say this calls for extra male confidence!).

You can also achieve the same effect (or close) leaning on a door post or wall with one hand, the other hand inside the pocket, thumb sticking out and pointing towards you-know-where.

Any hand gesture that draws attention to the groin area shows great sexual and social confidence. A lot depends on whether the woman in question approves of a cave-man approach.

Will any one of these eye and body communication gestures net you the man or woman of your dreams?

Not necessarily. Personally, I do not believe that mechanical body language gestures however effortless and flawless can do anything for you other than boost your confidence and get the sexual energy flowing in your body. At the end of the day, its the confident vibes coming from you that start the sexual attraction. Body language can only get the already existing sexual chemistry going. If you can use body language to cause a chain reaction, you're half way there!

And just as it takes effort and practice to be fluent in any language, you need practice to become fluent in body language. You can practice in front of a mirror or with the help of a supportive friend. You'll see that as you become more fluent in your flirting and sexual attraction body language, your confidence in yourself as a sexually attractive man or woman increases too.

Don't take yourself too seriously. The goal is not to become a body language expert but to become sexually confident with the opposite sex. So just have fun with your sexual being. Its yours to enjoy!

You can also use this knowledge to judge whether someone is flirting with you, interested in you and attracted in you. You can also use this knowledge to tell if someone is flirting with you, interested in you and attracted to you. Keep in mind, body language is no exact science.

For graphic illustrations of these very powerful flirting and sexual attraction body language signals, please click here and watch your flirting and sexual confidence hit the roof!

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Post SSRI Sexual Dysfunction - Help Understanding Post SSRI Libido Side Effects

Though sexual dysfunction and loss of libido are symptoms themselves of depression, sexual side effects have also been attributed to SSRIs once their use has been discontinued. Post antidepressant libido side effects can last anywhere from months to years; the occurrence of some sort of sexual dysfunction related to post antidepressant use is thought to be anywhere from 30 to 50 percent.

What are the Libido Side Effects?

The reasons for the sexual side effects for those who discontinue use after prolonged usage are not yet clear. It is also not yet clear whether these stand alone or if they are simply a part of what is called SSRI discontinuation syndrome. The main sexual side dysfuntcions that occur in post antidepressant use are as follows:

Absence/decrease in libido
Impotence
Premature ejaculation
Lack of response to sexual stimuli
Absence of pleasure during orgasm
Inability to obtain orgasm

Are There SSRIs that Reduce Post Usage Libido Decline?

There are studies that exist that have measured the incidences of sexual dysfunction from the various antidepressants. Below is the percentage of occurrences of those using a SSRI that had some sort of sexual dysfunction according to a 2006 study published in the American Journal of Psychiatry.

Fluoxetine (Prozac) - 36 %
Sertraline (Zoloft) - 40 %
Citalopram (Celexa) - 41 %
Paroxetine (Paxil) - 43 %

As you can see, the numbers are pretty similar and could simply be due to various other factors rather than the specific antidepressant's differing effect on the libido. This being the case, it would be hard for your doctor to determine which of the various drugs would be least likely to produce sexual side effects.

How to Deal with Post Usage Sexual Dysfunction

Unfortunately, without a definitive known cause for the sexual side effects of antidepressant use, the treatment of these side effects is not a science. There is no magical pill or shot that you can be given.

There are, however, many options available to you if you suffer from these effects. One of the most successful attempts to reduce the intensity of these is through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). CBT is used, many times in concert with an SSRI, to help with psychological problems. Because there is thought to be a psychological component to these effects, many doctors think one of the best ways to treat this sexual dysfunction is by lifestyle changes. A healthier body is generally an inspiration to a healthier sex life. Of course, you should consult your doctor if you notice any of these SSRI side effects (or any others) that persist.

Here are a few things to consider that may help restore your libido.

Exercise
Change to a healthy diet
Control your drinking
Lose weight
Stop smoking

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The Sexual Spirit of Post Menopause - Or the Goddess Was a Lover

Now that the children of the swinging Sixties are approaching their own 60s, the sexual challenge renews itself in a different way. What kind of sexuality is relevant now - if at all? So many seem to be embracing an asexual old age. Perhaps post-menopausal time is the time for a more transcendental approach to sexuality.

Let menopause be the death of the bad, sad, and dutiful sex - but not the death of sex. In old age, being our authentic selves (in or out of relationship), our sexuality, and our spirituality is the path itself. The reawakening of spirituality and a renewed sexuality are mutually inclusive. It is Crone's work and part of our conscious evolution

In legend, the Great Goddess had three aspects - all parts divine; like the moon in her phases, like life itself - past/present/future, birth/life/death. She is Virgin / Mother / Crone; Maiden / Wife /Witch.

Other versions described four aspects; chaste, promiscuous, motherly and bloodthirsty; modest, sensual, nurturing and ruthless; virginal, harlot, fertile and warlike; immaculate, wanton, motherly and warrior.

All renditions have the fierce component and the nurturing/fertile aspect. But sexuality is befuddled and divided; what does it mean to be chaste and promiscuous? We do not have an image for it because our worldview denies a sacred sexuality, sex is either good or bad. So chaste is split from promiscuous, modest from sensual, virgin from harlot, immaculate from wanton. Essentially the lover aspect is separated from both mother and maiden - and severely condemned. In truth the lover aspect is the priestess of love - serving eros. She is ecstatic and transcendent in nature. We need to feel the lover within us, in all aspects of our life. (Sacred) sexuality imbues all aspects of the life cycle.

Defining the Virgin by her unbroken hymen is a patriarchal concept, a limited and literal understanding of virginity. Metaphorically and psychologically, the Virgin is the autonomous part of a woman's psyche; the intrinsic self not owned by, needing, or requiring a man's validation. She could be sexual - or not. (On the matter of "losing your virginity", there is the wonderful story in the novel Red Tent, where the older women gently pierce the hymen at first menstruation with one of those little goddess figurines. Essentially, the menstruating girl's initial physical penetration is an initiation by the goddess - not a male violation with blood on the sheet in barbaric proof of possession.)

The patriarchy had to wrest control of the life cycle from the Goddess. Life and death were fairly straightforward; but to command procreation, the mother/wife had to be owned in marriage, and sexuality had to be strictly confined there. The mother image was idealised and spiritualised. She was always caring and patient; no room for anger and frustration.

By severe distortion, then, the Virgin and Mother phases of the ancient goddess could be assimilated into Christianity. But the Crone absolutely could not; the word itself suggests the crown of lost powerful ancient queens. The Crone was wise, mysterious, independent - and awesome. Too much like the male god aspect! According to Barbara Walker, patriarchal religions could not achieve full control of men's minds until the crone figure was suppressed.

Compare the wisdom figure of India, where the divine Shakti is "an almost untranslatable amalgam of wife, mistress, queen, power, genius, strength, authority, mind, vulva, woman and cosmic energy", and every god needed his Shakti in order to act. Here are multifaceted options for real women!

But in the West they crippled our Crone, leaving only images of ugly witches, evil stepmothers, and harmless little old ladies. A wise and wonderful (and sexual) Crone has been absent from our culture and our conscious awareness for too long. Without her, our life options are distorted - and old age bleak indeed.

The Crone's liberation is to "exercise her own will", after centuries, to incorporate all aspects, virgin, mother, crone - and lover.

Reclaiming the Crone means the spiritual and psychological deepening of soul that maturity can bring, including a clearing and healing of one's sexual wounds. Only this is a proper platform for the redefinition of sexuality (and spirituality) required at menopause that can lead to a radically new kind of vital aging.

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